


Pink Auras and What to Do About Them

by predilection



Category: Hanazakari no Kimitachi e - Ikemen Paradise | Hana-Kimi (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-25
Updated: 2015-08-25
Packaged: 2018-04-17 06:02:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,734
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4655352
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/predilection/pseuds/predilection
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nakatsu likes to talk to himself, even when Kayashima is in earshot.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pink Auras and What to Do About Them

**Author's Note:**

> I was re-watching episode 10 of the live action Hana Kimi series from 2007 and ended up writing this Nakatsu/Kayashima fic.
> 
> Warning: This fic references a homophobic moment in the series.

There are many things that Taiki knows about Nakatsu.

Taiki knows that Nakatsu falls in love with Ashiya, that it takes him months to come to terms with his sexuality, and that he has finally learned that Ashiya is a woman.

Taiki knows this not only because he can read Nakatsu's auras, but because Nakatsu talks to himself in their room even when Taiki is there and listening.

He knows that despite learning Ashiya's gender, Nakatsu still finds himself attracted to men sometimes. He also knows that after Nakatsu gets over his crush on Ashiya, that Nakatsu ends up with a new crush.

It takes Taiki a week to realize that Nakatsu's new crush is on him. 

Nakatsu's aura confirms this. It's pinker when he's around Taiki than it is when he's around anyone else.

What Taiki doesn't know is why Nakatsu likes him.

*

There's a spirit of a woman named Shiori Kitagawa who sometimes hangs out around the edges of their campus. Taiki looked her up and discovered that she was a former student of Saint Blossom's who passed away twenty years ago. At first he wondered why she spent so much time at Osaka High School, but he's gathered that she likes to amuse herself by watching their school's drama. 

Taiki goes to visit her from time to time. She doesn't seem vengeful and, for a spirit, she's quite good at holding a conversation.

"Your roommate is in the bushes over there watching you," Kitagawa tells him gleefully on an autumn afternoon.

Taiki turns, and sure enough, there's a pink aura coming from the one of the nearby shrubs. 

Taiki sighs. "Nakatsu," he calls out. "Are you following me?"

Nakatsu jumps out of the bushes, a guilty expression on his face and his hands awkwardly held behind his back.

"Uh, no. that is--" Nakatsu blushes and stutters some more before saying, "I was, uh, wondering if you'd maybe want to eat lunch together?"

"Oh dear," Kitagawa coos. "He's got it bad."

Taiki ignores her. He's hungry and he can't think of any reason to decline Nakatsu's request, so he accepts.

They grab something from the cafeteria and eat it at a table together. There's nothing special or different about it, except for the way that he catches Nakatsu staring at him sometimes, and, of course, how _pink_ his aura is.

Later, when Taiki visits Kitagawa again, she teases, "How did your date go?"

*

Over the next two weeks, Nakatsu starts to go out of his way to spend as much time with Taiki as possible.

They used to hang out quite a bit, with them being roommates and being in the same dorm, but now Nakatsu's presence seems to double in his life. He even takes an interest in Taiki's abilities -- the same abilities he once told Taiki not to talk about in his presence.

"You said you thought spirits were frightening," Taiki reminds him.

Nakatsu shrugs, trying to make it look casual but not quite succeeding. "But they're an important part of your life."

The thing is, outside of his family, pretty much everyone seems to be creeped out by his abilities. He eyes Nakatsu warily, figuring that his curiosity is a result of his crush rather than genuine interest.

"I mean," Nakatsu continues, "it isn't like there's a ghost in this room with us right now."

Taiki checks. "No," he tells Nakatsu. "Not right now."

Nakatsu's back suddenly straightens and his eyes go wide. "Wait. What do you mean 'not right now'?"

"There are many spirits that pass through this campus," he explains to Nakatsu, expecting him to snap and ask Taiki to stop talking about this at any moment. "Sometimes they pass through our dorms, but they rarely linger and they're almost all harmless."

Nakatsu frowns as he processes this. "And you can see them?"

"When I look."

"Oh." Nakatsu catches Taiki off guard when he adds, "That must be lonely."

"What?"

"I mean, you see spirits that no one else does, and most of the time, you don't tell anyone about them."

"Most people don't want to hear about them," Taiki points out. He doesn't add: _and you're one of those people_.

Nakatsu's frown deepens and he tells Taiki, "You can talk to me about them, if you want."

Taiki blinks at Nakatsu in surprise. "Okay," he says, even though he doesn't really believe him. He knows that once he starts talking to Nakatsu about what he sees, Nakatsu will get uncomfortable and stop hanging out with him. 

_Maybe_ , Taiki thinks, _this will make Nakatsu realize how ridiculous his crush on me really is._

*

For a few days, Taiki is right: Nakatsu acts uncomfortable and shudders every time Taiki tells him about a spirit in the room. A week later, that changes though.

"There's a man wailing about his children over there," he tells Nakatsu, pointing towards the painting over the fireplace in the cafeteria. They're eating lunch again, just the two of them.

As Nakatsu grimaces, Taiki excuses himself so he can exorcize the spirit.

"It feels different," Nakatsu tells him when Taiki returns to his seat. "Like the room is less gloomy somehow. Did you do something?"

"I sent him on his way," Taiki says, turning his attention back to his lunch.

"You gave him peace," Nakatsu says.

Taiki almost drops his chopsticks, and afterwards, he's not sure whether it's because of Nakatsu's unexpected words or because of the gentle expression that was on his face when he said them.

*

"So how do your abilities work exactly?" Nakatsu asks him one evening just as Taiki is starting to fall asleep.

"I was born with them," he replies. "My father has them too."

Nakatsu is quiet for a long moment. "Does that mean that you could see spirits as a child?"

"No," he replies, and it hits him that Nakatsu is the first person to ever ask him this question. "My abilities have gotten stronger as I've gotten older. When I was a child, I could only see hints of people's auras." Although she didn't have the same abilities, it was his mother who had taught him how to read them.

Nakatsu makes a thoughtful sound. "Does it ever get tiring seeing things other people don't?" he asks.

Taiki feels exhausted all of a sudden, and it's not just because it's late and he wants to sleep. "Yes," he answers, and thankfully Nakatsu doesn't ask him anymore questions.

*

Nakatsu gets sick a week later.

Taiki finds out when he returns on a Sunday night after spending the weekend with his family.

"It's the flu," Ashiya tells him. "Sano's got it too, and so does Sekime and Namba-senpai." 

Sure enough, when Taiki returns to their room, Nakatsu is huddled under a pile of blankets, face flushed and sweaty. A sickly white aura surrounds him.

"Kayashima?" he asks when Taiki leans over him to check his temperature. 

"I hope you feel better soon," Taiki says.

"Welcome back," Nakatsu says, grinning up at him. He seems slightly delirious. "I missed you when you weren't here."

Taiki swallows. 

Nakatsu closes his eyes, and Taiki goes up to his bed. He thinks Nakatsu is asleep until Nakatsu mumbles, so quietly that Taiki has to strain to hear, "He doesn't like me. I can tell, so I need to get over him."

Taiki looks down at Nakatsu over the edge of the balcony. Nakatsu is staring at the wall. Taiki already knows that he's talking to himself and, like always, that he's unaware that he's doing it.

"It's like Mizuki all over again except this time it's really with a guy," Nakatsu continues. "But that makes it harder because Kayashima doesn't--" Nakatsu cuts himself off to make a sound of frustration and then stills and settles into the bed, like he's trying to sleep.

Taiki stares into space for what feels like an hour, before getting to his feet, going down the stairs and refreshing the cloth he figures Ashiya placed on Natatsu's forehead.

Nakatsu doesn't stir, and Taiki sits next to him, examining his face.

Even warm with fever, sweat plastering his hair to his forehead, Nakatsu is attractive. While Taiki finds him a little boisterous sometimes, he's never boring, and he's surprisingly kind.

Taiki knows he could easily fall for someone like him, if he let himself.

*

A few days later, Taiki sits with a textbook in his lap on a bench outside trying to finish his history readings.

He hears Nakatsu and Ashiya before he sees them, but soon they come into view, Ashiya walking Yujiro and Nakatsu walking next to her.

They don't seem to notice him, because Ashiya is saying to Nakatsu, "You should tell him!"

Nakatsu is bright red. "No way!" he says, arms flailing. "The second he finds out, he's going to ask for a room reassignment!"

Suddenly, Taiki feels like he's been doused in cold water. He remembers telling Nakatsu that he'd change rooms if Nakatsu turned out to be gay, and now he knows that it had been an awful thing to say. If anything, it was his way of hiding his own fear of being discovered. 

But Nakatsu had worked through his fears for Ashiya, and he became stronger in the process -- stronger than Taiki has ever been. It was watching Nakatsu make peace with his sexuality that helped Taiki make peace with his own. Not that he's ever told anyone this.

Taiki shakes his head to clear his thoughts. It doesn't work. Guilt coils low and heavy in his belly.

"Really? He probably already knows," Ashiya says.

They're on the other side of the bushes closest to Taiki, and he can see Nakatsu's jaw drop. "How could he already know?"

Ashiya rolls her eyes as she tells Nakatsu, "He can read auras, remember? And you're around him all the time."

"But, he-- but he hasn't said anything, or tried to kick me out!" Nakatsu exclaims. "He can't know!"

Taiki feels like he can't breathe. He grabs his textbook and hastily runs off before either of them have a chance to notice him.

*

Taiki sits against a secluded side of the main school building, back to the wall, and hugs his knees. He can see his own aura. It's a gross blue-ish green that reflects his guilt and self-loathing, so he closes his eyes.

"Kayashima?" 

Taiki looks up to see Kitagawa hovering above him. She sounds worried and it's strange because she usually sounds amused. "What happened?"

"Nakatsu likes me," he tells her.

"And?" she asks, her tone more lively. "What else is new?"

"He thinks I'll reject him," Taiki says.

"Will you?" she asks gently.

Taiki honestly never thought it would be an issue. He always figured that the more Nakatsu got to know him, the more turned off he would be until his crush went away on its own.

But that's not what's happened. Instead of being disgusted by him, Nakatsu has come to like him more, even though he thinks Taiki is a homophobe who will reject him outright just because of who he is.

It's Taiki who gave him that impression. He's been cruel to Nakatsu without meaning to be, and now Nakatsu is hurting because of him.

"Not for the reasons he thinks, at least," he replies finally.

Kitagawa perks up and flashes him a mischievous grin. "Does this mean you like him?"

He thinks of Nakatsu's smile, and when he looks down at his hands, they're still blue-ish green, but they also have a slight pink tint to them.

Taiki frowns and tells her, "I'm worried I'm starting to."

*

Taiki drops down into the seat across from Nakatsu and Nakatsu looks up from his textbook, surprised.

"I thought we could study together," Taiki says, taking out his history textbook and putting it down on his side of the desk. They don't study together often, especially since Nakatsu has been studying with Ashiya and Sano recently.

Nakatsu nods, still looking a little shocked, but goes back to his studying.

Twenty minutes later, Nakatsu lets out an aggravated-sounding noise and starts pulling at his hair. "This formula doesn't make any sense!" 

Taiki gets up, walks around the desk, and leans over Nakatsu's shoulder. The formula he's trying to understand is tricky, and Taiki had trouble with it too before he finally figured it out. He picks up Nakatsu's pencil and writes out a practice question which he then uses to explain the formula to him. 

Nakatsu is silent through Taiki's explanation, and when Taiki asks, "Does that make sense?" he receives no reply.

Taiki turns his head to look at Nakatsu and immediately notices that Nakatsu is staring back at him and that they're a breath apart.

Nakatsu's eyes are dark with longing, and Taiki finds himself saying, softly, "I won't kick you out, you know?"

Nakatsu seems to shake himself and pulls back abruptly. "What?" he asks, sounding a little dazed.

Taiki stays where he is. "I won't ask for another room," he says, sighing even as the heavy weight in his belly starts to disappear. "Or a roommate transfer. Not for any reason."

"Okay?" Nakatsu says, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion.

Taiki walks back to his side of the desk and as he sits back down, Nakatsu jumps into the air. "Wait. What?" Taiki looks up at him, calmly, as Nakatsu continues, eyes wide, "Did you just--? I mean, do you mean?"

Taiki nods.

"Huh," Nakatsu says, his aura growing bigger and brighter, and when Taiki tries to focus on his textbook again, he can feel Nakatsu's eyes on him.

*

After their conversation, Nakatsu seems happier and less anxious than before. He leans into Taiki's space more easily, and he's less nervous when he talks to Taiki.

His aura is different too. It's a purer-looking pink. Taiki hadn't realized just how much Nakatsu's worries were affecting it.

Somehow, Nakatsu seems to be even more attractive like this -- all big smiles and friendly touches -- and it isn't long before Taiki knows that he's falling and falling hard.

*

Taiki's lying on his bed and writing an e-mail to his cousin, when he hears Nakatsu mumble, "Just because he won't kick me out doesn't mean he likes me."

Taiki rolls over so he can look down at Nakatsu, who is pacing as he talks to himself.

"It just means he doesn't hate me, which is good, and it means that Mizuki was right and he knows. But if he knows and he didn't say anything -- no, that doesn't tell me anything. Oh no. What if I'm right and he doesn't like any other gender but girls? I need to talk to Mizuki again." He clenches a fist in determination and walks out the door.

Taiki watches him go and knows he'll have to make a decision soon.

*

They're eating dinner together when Nakatsu asks, "Uh, what would you say if someone asked you out. I mean, hypothetically."

"Why?"

"Uh, no reason," Nakatsu tells him. "I was just. Um. Curious. That's all."

"No," Taiki explains. "I'd _ask them why_."

"Why they asked you out?" Nakatsu asks.

Taiki frowns as he hums in agreement.

"Wait. What kind of question is that?" Nakatsu starts to laugh, but then he takes one look at Taiki's expression and sobers. "You're serious."

Taiki nods. "I am."

"Why would you even ask that?" Nakatsu asks, looking puzzled.

Taiki raises an eyebrow at him. "I'm strange," he reminds him.

"So what? That's just what makes you unique," Nakatsu says.

"My abilities creep people out," Taiki says.

Nakatsu crosses his arms across his chest. "That's because they don't understand them. I mean, sure, I found them creepy at first, but now I think it's pretty cool that you can talk to spirits and help them and stuff."

He sounds so sure of himself -- so sure of his belief that Taiki isn't scary -- that Taiki finds himself staring at Nakatsu in shock.

Nakatsu fidgets. "Don't look so surprised," he says and he still sounds confident despite his awkward body language. "It's true!"

Taiki doesn't know what to say to that.

*

"I think I need to tell him," Taiki says, later that night.

"Tell him what?" Kitagawa asks, but Taiki can tell from the smirk on her face that she already knows his answer.

"That I like him too," he says anyway.

Kitagawa clasps her hands together and looks absolutely delighted. "When are you going to do it? Can I come watch?"

Taiki glares at her. "I don't know, and no. Definitely no."

She pouts. "You're no fun."

He sighs and leans against a nearby wall.

"You like him and he likes you, so why the long face?" Kitagawa asks.

"I've never had someone like me before," he replies. "Not like this. He doesn't even seem to mind that I can see spirits."

"Is that a bad thing?

Taiki thinks about it. "No."

"Then what's bothering you?" Kitagawa asks.

"I guess... it's that he's popular and easily liked by everyone," he tells her. "He's attractive even by the standards of this school, and his aura is so _bright_. And I'm strange, talk to spirits, and prefer to be alone. He could pick anyone, so... why does he like me?"

"Oh, Kayashima," Kitagawa says. She's hovering in front of him, hands raised awkwardly, and he knows that if she had a physical form, she would be hugging him right now. "You don't give yourself nearly enough credit. You're smart and you're friendly. Plus, you're kind enough to hang out with spirits like me and let us stay in this world. And you're not hard on the eyes either. If I was still alive, I'd definitely have a crush on you." She winks at him.

Taiki knows he looks skeptical, and Kitagawa huffs.

"Nakatsu likes you because you're great. Just because you can't see your own greatness doesn't mean other people can't."

Her words remind Taiki of what Nakatsu said about his abilities making him unique, and for the first time, Taiki wonders if the problem isn't that Nakatsu likes him, but that he believes himself to be unlikeable.

"Oh," he says as this realization rushes through him and begins to subtly change the way he understands his world. 

He's so overwhelmed by the epiphany that he has to shake himself to pay attention to Kitagawa when she puts her hands on her hips and asks, "So if I can't watch you when you tell him, will you at least give me a play-by-play later?"

*

Taiki's not sure what say to Nakatsu so he doesn't say anything until an opportunity presents itself two days later when they're studying together and Nakatsu starts talking to himself. 

"I need to get over him," he repeats over and over again under his breath as he stares intently as his math textbook.

"Are you sure about that?" Taiki asks, and Nakatsu startles so badly that he falls out of his chair.

"Uh, that is," Nakatsu starts to say, scrambling back into his chair. "I mean, uh. You don't. Um." He flushes and looks away. "Sorry," he says, in a more serious tone, "I didn't mean to..."

As he trails off, Taiki gathers his courage, takes a deep breath and says, "I like you, too." 

Nakatsu blinks at him, like he's not quite processing what Taiki is saying. "What?"

"I like you, too," Taiki repeats. 

Nakatsu blinks at him some more, still seeming confused. "You like me?" he asks.

Taiki holds his hands up in the air and offers Nakatsu a small smile. "I know you can't see it, but my aura is pink when I'm around you."

"Your aura is pink-- Eeeeeeh!" Nakatsu's eyes go wide as he finally _gets_ it. He jumps up out of his chair and runs around the desk to crouch in front of Taiki. "You like me," he says again, this time pointing at Taiki and then back at himself.

"Yes," Taiki says, laughing a little at Nakatsu's antics.

"Does that mean--?" Nakatsu can't seem to finish the sentence.

"Yes, Nakatsu," he tells him again and grins. He suddenly feels lighter and happier than he has in a long, long time.

Nakatsu grins back at him, raises his arms in the air and cheers. 

*

They end up going out for okonomiyaki for dinner and Nakatsu declares it their first date.

"Are there any spirits here?" Nakatsu asks, once they're seated at the restaurant.

Taiki looks around. "No, but the man sitting in the corner has a purple aura. That's pretty rare. It means he's lost someone dear to him, and that that loss is haunting him. But he's hopeful too. Maybe he's waiting for someone."

When Taiki turns his attention back to Nakatsu, Nakatsu is staring intently at the table. Brows furrowed, Nakatsu mumbles quietly, "I can't believe he wanted to ask someone why they like him. I mean, how he can see so many things no one else does, but not what everyone else does?"

"Nakatsu," Taiki says, surprised and awed by his words. He remembers Kitagawa telling him something similar to this and he's suddenly thankful that she and Nakatsu are his friends.

"Huh? What?" Nakatsu startles. He recovers quickly though and asks excitedly, "What kind of drinks do you want to order?"

Later, as they're eating their meal, Nakatsu tells Taiki about the time his dad took him fishing and he ended up soaking wet and covered in raw fish. Taiki laughs until there are tears in his eyes, and until he knows he's only upright because of the warm hands Nakatsu has on his shoulders. 

It's the most fun he's had all year.

*

"You two look so cute together!" Kitagawa tells him a month later.

"I told you not to spy on us," Taiki reminds her. 

"I was only in the cafeteria for, like, a second yesterday," she admits, not sounding remotely guilty. 

"Kitagawa," Taiki says warningly.

"Fine. I'll stop, but you both were laughing," she tells him. "And you looked happy. Really happy." Then she drops down so she's no longer floating above him and so she can look him in the eye. "Are you happy?" she asks softly.

"Kayashima!" 

They both turn to see Nakatsu running in their direction wearing a ridiculously large grin on his face. He waves at Taiki.

Taiki finds himself smiling and waving back. "Yeah," he tells her. "I think I am."


End file.
